Conflict happens in all areas of our lives and in all our relationships whether these be professional or personal. It involves a disagreement on some level that can lead to feelings of frustration, unhappiness and resentment. It is often unavoidable as it is difficult to predict and control how other people react and sometimes it may feel difficult to control our own responses to those around us and the situations we may find ourselves in.

Why bother resolving conflict?

Conflict cannot only leave you feeling bad and cause tension in your relationships in the short-term, if unresolved and tension persists, can have long-term damaging effects in your personal and professional life and take its toll on your mental and physical wellbeing. The benefits in trying to resolve conflicts are enormous and can mean the difference in staying in your job or in a close relationship and feeling happier, or feeling that you have no choice but to leave.

If conflict is inevitable, then let’s get good at resolving it!

Running away from conflicts isn’t the answer; new ones will arise somewhere else along your path. I believe that a conflict shows us something important about ourselves and is a personal growth opportunity. 

Let’s look at ways to resolve conflict.

·         Arrange a time and place to meet to discuss the conflict; meeting face-to-face is preferable to a voice/video call. Let the person know that you would like to talk about something that happened and figure out a solution together and check that they are willing to talk.

·         Remain calm and ensure you are in a relaxed state before meeting. You may find this difficult but it is worth trying; the calmer you feel, the better you will be able to think and you will be more receptive to interpret the other person. Try to spend 5 minutes before meeting, slowing your breathing down and take some deep breaths.